Show Season: Being the mother of a young eventer part 2...

Having recently returned from a two day show at Fitch's Corner in Millbrook, New York, I am in a perfect frame of mind to give you a view into the glamour that is the life of an eventing mom.

For this show we decided we needed to leave the barn around noon on Friday so that meant being at the barn by 8am. We had not done any real preparation ahead of time so this was actually quite luxurious. We went down to get our trailer, threw 3 bales of hay in from the hay shed, drove up by Elizabeth's stall and unhooked. I left Elizabeth at the barn to pack and headed out to the feed store to buy some shavings and fill up with gas.

If you are stabling, it takes two bags to fill the stall and we bring an extra for filler during the show. For this show I bought 5 bags since we were taking our trainer's horse with us as well. The trailer was already full of shavings so that was great.

By the time I got back to the barn, Elizabeth and her trainer had done a good amount of packing. I helped with some of the loading since it was a bit of an organizational challenge to fit everything for two horses and 3 people but our trailer has a really nice tack room so it works out. Elizabeth and Erika took their horses out for a hack while I lunged my horse. When they got back they gave the horses baths and shortly thereafter we loaded them up and hit the road.

We had about a 4 hour drive ahead of us including a quick stop for ice cream and some traffic on the Mass Pike. Unfortunately, none of us had read the directions on the Omnibus and the nav system in my car took us down some unnecessarily long and windy roads. Eventually, we arrived but this wasn't the first time I was reminded that we should always consult someone who had been to the venue before about the best route before setting out!

When you arrive at a multi-day event far away from everything, most people stable on the property. In most places this means a tent village of temporary stalls. Fitch's had 11 rows of 20 temporary stalls. Someone generally meets you at the gate and directs you to your stabling. Some shows do a better job of this than others. Fitch's was awesome. A man in a golf cart led us to our stalls and showed us where to park while we unloaded.

This is when the real work begins. It is all hands on deck. The first task is to throw shavings into the stalls and unload the horses into the stalls. Next we dig out the water buckets, fill them and put them in the stalls. Sometimes this is easy and other times it is a serious pain. Fitch's had huge water tankers positioned every few rows in stabling but still, you have to walk a ways to fill the buckets and carrying full water buckets all the way back is no joke. The purchase of a large wheel barrow is in my future! Next we fed the horses their hay cubes and grain while continuing to unload. Each horse has a trunk, two saddles, saddle racks, bridle hooks, bridles, buckets for numerous purposes, water jugs, and more. We bring chairs, muck buckets, a shovel, pitchfork, broom, etc. While the riders set up the stabling area I park the trailer. Once things are organized, it's time to walk the horses.

Next we track down the secretary's booth. Sometimes this is a serious challenge but again, Fitch's is a really great venue. The booth was close at hand and in no time at all we had our packets, XC course maps and schedule for the next day.

Erika and Elizabeth walking the BN Course.

Figuring out when to walk Cross Country can be complicated. Elizabeth had ample time but she needed time to walk it with her trainer and her trainer had her own course to walk. Friday night while Elizabeth's trainer walked her course with her own trainer, Elizabeth cleaned tack for another woman from Course Brook who brought two horses. Bottom line, there is always more work to be done and never an idle moment!

At this point I ran out for food so that we wouldn't all starve. It was already 7:00pm and we were in a pretty remote location. In the future, I am bringing way more food with me to horse shows. I've been relying on concessions but even a good concession can't really feed us well for almost three days.

By the time we had walked the horses again, fed them and tidied up to leave it was 9:00pm. We were staying about 40 minutes away in Poughkeepsie. We stopped along the way to the hotel to grab some more food and were finally asleep by 11:30pm. When at all possible, stay close to the venue. It makes an enormous difference in your level of comfort over the weekend.

The rest of a show weekend proceeds pretty consistently. We get up each morning at 5:50am so that we will be at the show grounds by 7:00am to feed and water the horses and take them for a walk. If we travel with a big group we can take turns being the last one to check the horses at night or the first to check them in the morning but this time we were all stabled too far apart to make that practical. I will admit that my job as a show mom has been less intense lately since my daughter is now able to do her own braiding, mucking, water carrying, etc. But I do jump in and help where I can to speed things up so I often run to get water while Elizabeth feeds and mucks, I help walk the horses or go buy food while everyone is braiding.

Before you know it, the time has come to head to dressage. At Fitch's Elizabeth and her trainer went to walk the stadium course while I polished tall boots and tacked up my daughter's horse. When they got back Elizabeth jumped on Quizz and I followed, camera in hand.

You will notice that many people have some mode of transportation with them at these shows. The distance between stabling and various events can be significant. At Fitch's I would say we walked at least 1/2 mile to dressage and XC. Then 1/2 mile back. FitBit fans will love showing!! Others will value a bicycle or scooter of some type. I'm still trying to convince my husband that I need a pink Vespa. I have the rack for the back of the trailer all picked out!

Once you find dressage, the next challenge is identifying your ring (Fitch's has 5!) and checking in with the steward. As the mom I usually hold the show coats until they are needed. I carry a towel in case a boot gets dusty or the horse slobbers in some unattractive way. I DO NOT SAY ANYTHING!!!!!  This is pretty key for a show mom. You have to know when to be quiet. I don't tell her to smile. I don't tell her to put her heels down. Her trainer will tell her the one or two things that might help. If I'm feeling bold I will tell her to have fun and give her a big smile!

And on it goes, untacking, tacking, changing of wardrobe, following friends, trainers and others around to their various events.

Let's talk about temperature. Horse show weekends seem to mostly be freezing cold or wretchedly hot and humid. I've gone both ways - overpacking and under packing - and highly recommend being prepared for anything if you have the space. At GMHA in June it rained and we were all wearing every piece of clothing we owned. At Fitch's in July we were wilting. The air was so thick with water it felt as though we were swimming. And the riders were out there in the blazing sun with heavy show jackets on for stadium!

Another useful tip - the new synthetic jackets are a great innovation. There are even some very thin mesh jackets out there. The mesh doesn't have enough stability to look crisp and polished so I didn't let my daughter go with that jacket but when she stops growing I will add one to her wardrobe for the days that it is simply inhuman to put her in anything else.

As the days wear on and the troops get tired and cranky, it is up to the show mom to forage for food, drinks and anything that will keep the competitors smiling with their head in the game. I find ice cream to be the handiest tool. Stay out of the way but notice when there is a need and fill it. Be mindful of the schedule but never act like you know something the rider doesn't know, especially if your rider is a teenager!

Eventually, you get to your last event. For us it was Elizabeth's cross country at Fitch's. It was SOOOO hot!!! Fitch's, again a phenomenal venue, provided ice machines filled with free ice. Before heading out for XC we filled a bucket with water, made sure the sponge and scraper were on hand. Some people brought their buckets to the finish line, we left ours at the stabling. Regardless, it was a day that made it necessary at any level to cool down the horses sufficiently after their runs. Also before heading to the last event we had all started removing shavings from our stalls and packing items into the truck and trailer - anything to make our exit a bit quicker! Some venues have pony club kids mucking stalls to raise money but we were on our own with this one!

Used with permission from Joanne Davis, FlatlandsFoto.

We made the trek out to XC. Elizabeth and Quizz had a blast and were happy and hot upon their return. We got back to stabling, iced down our water with the complimentary ice, and got to work sponging and scraping, sponging and scraping, sponging and scraping. Then we took turns grazing, mucking and undoing all the work we had done to set up our little home away from home.

Eventually we pull the trailer around, load up, and get on our way. Here, again, the show mother is in charge of morale, food and beverage! Unfortunately, I'm not the greatest show mom these days. The heat gets to me and I was feeling pretty rubbish by the time we were done mucking. Thankfully, we have the best trainer in the world and she took over willingly. She even ended up driving us home through an absolutely insane rain storm.

After unloading the horses, I glanced into the tack room of the trailer and nearly had a heart attack. But, this was not a pony club outing and honestly, the mess could wait a day. We headed home for much needed food, showers and rest. The day after the show the horses get a day off to enjoy their paddocks and we get a day to clean up the mess.

At the end of an eventing weekend, we all agree it was a great time but we are not sure we would do it again. But, like child birth, we soon forget all the pain involved and look fondly at the ribbons and photos. We get excited about the next time at a favorite venue or perhaps somewhere we haven't been before. We gather up our friends and make plans to eat together on Saturday night somewhere special. And so it begins again...

Show Season: Being the mother of a young eventer out competing.

As in most equestrian sports, young eventers start with schooling shows. When Elizabeth first arrived at Course Brook, she wasn't ready to go out and do much. Events, also knows as horse trials, include 3 phases: dressage, show jumping and cross country. Before going cross country, a new eventer will participate in two phase shows: dressage and show jumping.  Elizabeth did a couple of those then moved on to some schooling HT, all at the pre-elementary level (cross rails, tiny logs) in the first year and mostly elementary the second year (2'3").

Through the winter Elizabeth and I wondered what the show season would hold.  Quizz recovered but between all the uncertainty about her situation and the fact that Elizabeth had yet to finish a recognized Beginner Novice (2'7"), we weren't sure what our path would be.

At first, we thought Elizabeth should spend one more season at schooling shows doing Beginner Novice so I made a long list of shows and started putting together a calendar. The great thing about schooling shows is that they tend to be close by and cost less. This year there is an Area I Schooling Horse Trials Championship so there was even the opportunity for qualifying for something and having some real fun at these shows.

It's not always easy to know where the schooling shows are nor if they are well run. The USEA Area I website does list a good number of shows. In addition, I just started thinking of every eventing barn I've ever seen at a show and googling them. Quite a few ran shows. Friends mentioned a few good ones to me; many of them run their own show series with year end awards.

As the season approached, our trainer told us Quizz and Elizabeth were ready to go to recognized, USEA Sanctioned HT.  Elizabeth had tried one last year on Pumba but was eliminated in Show Jumping. I felt a little nervous, a little out of my depth, but decided to go for it and came up with a new schedule of shows to attend. Our trainer is out competing her own young thoroughbred so we worked together to plan a schedule that we could all manage.

The plan was for Elizabeth and Quizz to do 4 Beginner Novice shows and then, if all went well, move up to Novice. Well, we are going to do 3 before the move up because Quizz is just so awesome it's a little silly and unfair to keep her down at Beginner Novice now that Elizabeth has gained some confidence. We were lucky that a horse competing at Preliminary last year was able to adjust to doing Beginner Novice.  She's such a cool horse! 

The shows are listed in the USEA Omnibus by Area. We live in Area I and some shows in Area II are close by enough to consider attending. We decided to do half the shows close to home and half the shows farther away. When the shows are a bit farther away, the cost goes up. For King Oak we can drive to the show on the day of competition, work out of our trailer, and head home at the end of competition. For GMHA, Fitch's Corner, UNH and Huntington, we need hotel rooms, stabling for the horses and meals on the road. GMHA and Fitch's are two day events which means 3 days away from home and two nights in a hotel.

The cost for a recognized HT varies but entry fees are usually just under $200.00. Stabling also varies but if it is on site it usually costs $125 - $200 depending on the duration of the show, type of stabling, etc. Many of these places are very remote so accommodations are not always straight forward and the first time you go to one of these places it's pretty tough to figure out where to stay. Our least expensive outing would be a day show like King Oak where we pay an entry fee and coaching fee and that's it. At the high end of the range for us is Fitch's Corner where we spent $210 for the entry fee, $195 for stabling for two nights, $400 for our hotel and quite a bit on gas since it was far from home and the commute to our hotel was pretty long. With food and coaching, we are in for about $1,000 for the weekend. Generally competitors cover the travel expenses of their trainer so if they need a hotel room, that should be factored in. If you don't have your own trailer, transportation is an additional cost.

When you travel to a show where you will be staying over night, you need to bring quite a bit of extra gear. You usually need 2-3 bags of shavings. Two bags will fill the stall but you need extra to keep it full after cleaning it. We bring a bale of hay per day and pack all our grain and supplements in ziplock bags so that one bag is one meal, marked with a sharpie with the horse's name and whether it is AM or PM feed. You will need grain buckets, water buckets, sheets depending on weather, a travel trunk (those black Stanley trunks with wheels from Home Depot are awesome and reasonably priced) and all the usual items you need to take care of you horse and go to a show.

Stay tuned for my next post in which I'll give you the unfiltered truth of being a mom AT the show. 

Drama: Ever notice how everything falls apart soon after getting a new horse?

Yesterday we found out my horse has a really bad case of kissing spine disease. If you don't know what that is, it involves the vertebrae, which should be separated by a little space, touching, or in the case of my horse, overlapping. But that's not the point. I bought a horse that appeared sound and rideable.  I vetted him but I did not do back x-rays though my vet implored me to do so. So why did this become an issue now?

I've noticed that when horses change homes, things fall apart. I have a theory about this but as you know, I am not an expert so you should always take what I say with a grain of salt. I think that in many cases horses and their people find coping mechanisms that let them keep going despite issues that may be just beneath the surface. I don't think anyone is being negligent or hiding anything. I think that they simply find workarounds or they have a consistent program so that even though an issue is brewing, a horse who knows exactly what to expect each day can just sort of keep going. And sometimes people don't want to know. They will do the little things when a horse isn't coping, just enough to keep things going, but don't want to open the big can of worms because then they would have to tackle the bigger issue.

When you change something as dramatic as the environment and the rider all at one time, the fragile balance just crumbles. A horse that would do anything for an owner he knows and trusts might start feeling like he doesn't want to go through the pain for a new person. Sometimes it is simply coincidence. Sometimes a new farrier or new saddle can create or exacerbate a problem.

It takes time to get to know a new horse. We probably missed signs that both Quizz and Crafty had pain early on because we just didn't know them and didn't understand what they were trying to tell us. I've observed that it takes 6 months to let the dust settle and a year to really know your new horse in a meaningful way. I have been happiest with buying horses in the fall. We worked through the issues in the winter and were able to have fun when the weather got better. Buying a horse in the spring means working through issues when we would rather be riding.

The trainer I work with tends to notice pretty subtle lameness. She won't ride a horse that might be in pain and she engages help if she's ever in doubt. She is less concerned with keeping all the horses in work for the sake of her income and more focused on the wellness of the horses and the safety of the riders. Rather than finding workarounds such as not riding with contact or staying off a horse's back in the canter or throwing the reins away over a jump, she calls in the vet.

Mine is the third horse under her care in the past 6 months to be in a place where he needs to start over completely. They needed to start over before she got involved but she is the one that is willing to draw the line. The other two are doing incredibly well, looking better than ever and enjoying their jobs so hopefully I will be traveling down a similar path.

Yesterday the vet did Mesotherapy (Novocain injected into the skin to stop the pain messages the nerves are sending to the brain, this is a short-term solution), administered Osphos (a bisphosphonate found to be helpful with bone issues, similar to Tildren) and did some steroid injections. Pretty aggressive but the intention is to stop the pain immediately. Crafty will have 5 days off then get back to work on the lunge line with the Pessoa. We will need to build up the muscles around his back and help him work with his back up and round rather than hollow. We will eventually put him under saddle, a new saddle I ordered which will be adjusted to fit him.

All of this started because Crafty had done some things that were just not acceptable. We excused him several times before concluding he might be telling us something is bothering him. He is so sweet on the ground but often very agitated under saddle. There didn't seem to be anything consistently causing the problem. He'd be great for two days then be unhappy on the third. He didn't look lame and he doesn't mind being saddled and stands still at the mounting block. Discovering issues in stoic horses is especially challenging.

Having seen his x-rays, I feel super guilty. On the plus side, his x-rays explain every single thing he has done. Knowledge is power and I feel better knowing what we are dealing with. The steps we took yesterday were reasonable in my book and I felt I owed the horse this chance to see if he can do his job and enjoy his life with me. I am so grateful that my husband agreed with me.

I did some reading on Kissing Spine last night. I'm feeling optimistic that with the proper work and therapy, Crafty can start feeling better and get back to full work. If you are interested, this article was super encouraging and this one explained some treatment options.

My greater concern now is who he will be when he feels better. In addition to finding that most horses have issues lurking beneath the surface, I have noticed that when you make a horse feel good, his personality can change. The sleepy pony with no shoes and no supplements was pretty sassy with shoes, a different diet and hock injections. Yesterday we removed Crafty's pain. Today he was pretty awake and excited.

While the vet was looking at his x-rays yesterday, Crafty kept sort of dozing off on the cross ties. The vet attributed it to the fact that a horse with such a bad back has a really hard time getting good sleep so he's sleep deprived. It makes perfect sense. Having suffered from chronic back pain myself, I have a great deal of sympathy for all that Crafty is going through. I have a sneaking suspicion that as we help him and as he starts feeling better and sleeping more, my very quiet, safe horse might just be a bit more than I bargained for when I bought him.

For now the plan is to help him. I am giving the situation 3 months. At least now we know what the issue is and we can take steps to address it. He still may not work out for me but at least I feel like I'm doing the right thing for him, helping him feel better and, if necessary, finding him a good home and a useful job.

Leasing: A look at the viewpoint of the lessor rather than the lessee.

I had quite the negotiation with my husband when I finally convinced him to buy a horse for me. He was not interested in the maintenance costs on a second horse so I took on some work at the barn to cover some of my board. I am the show secretary and webmaster as well as doing a few other odds and ends. The deal is that I need to find a lessee to ride my horse 3 days a week and pay the other half of my board.

When I leased a horse two days a week, my perspective on the whole situation was so different. I loved the horses I leased. I loved them as though they were my own and tried to be communicative with the owners and defer to their various care choices. On the lessee side of the fence, I didn't love that I wasn't in full control. In the case of both horses I leased, the owners decided to ride more and I lost access to the horses.

So now I am the lessor. I've only had my horse for one month and 6 days. I'm still getting to know him and I've been so busy with my new responsibilities at the barn that I haven't had as much time for him as I would like. Regardless, the pressure is on from my husband to find a lessee.

I have a friend who may be interested in leasing Crafty for herself or her daughter. She came by the other day to take a lesson on him. It was really difficult for me. I don't necessarily want to share him. I want to be his person. If I share him, he won't know he's mine. I had a hard time watching my friend lead him and tack him up. I'm very particular about how he is lead. He's not allowed to wander, drag his person off, start grazing, etc. I'm working to establish myself as his leader on the ground and under saddle. Will leasing my horse undermine that work?

My friend did a great job riding Crafty and I think she had fun. She will likely try him again but I'm not sure if he will work out for her or her daughter. They use a different trainer and I only want one trainer working with my horse, especially during the first year when we are still getting to know him. Having two riders is confusing enough. Two trainers, two different agendas and approaches, would not be fair to the horse.

I think there will be someone wonderful who wants to lease Crafty. He's a nice horse. But I think it will be interesting to see how people feel about the cost. He can be ridden 6 times per week. I will ride 3 times and lease him out for 3 rides which is a half lease. From where I am now sitting, half of board and $100.00 towards shoes sounds like a bargain. I am paying for all supplements, most of the shoes, routine vet care. I am providing really nice, brand new tack. I am providing a lovely horse, boarded at a barn with awesome facilities for riding.

I will require my lessee to take one lesson a week, at least for the first 6 months. I will also require them to do at least two sessions with our natural horsemanship trainer so that we are all on the same program. My poor lessee. I'm starting to feel sorry for her already.

If my lessee ends up being someone who wants to take Crafty to shows or camps, I will expect them to contribute to maintenance type veterinary care such as Adequan or joint injections. The reality is that my level of riding is putting very little wear and tear on the horse. I will also ask them to have their own saddle pads. I hate washing saddle pads. I don't really want to do it when I don't even get the pleasure of riding!

I think I'm ok with my lessee taking my horse places even though it feels terribly wrong. I will have to get over it but I feel like he's one of my children. I've been a stay at home mom for 17 years. I have rarely spent a day without at least one of my children. I don't know how people who are divorced with joint custody do it. On the one hand it looks so glamorous to have every other weekend to yourself but on the other hand, it would feel like a limb was missing.

This post seems to be more about personal therapy than about leasing a horse but if you are out looking to lease, I'm hoping my thoughts will help you think a little more kindly of the horse owner and the price they set for sharing their precious steed with another rider.

Distance: Buying a horse from far, far away.

If you read my most recent post, you know I found my dream horse in Canada. He checked off everything on my list of qualities I wanted in my horse except convenient location so I just decided that I had to go for it.

Buying a horse from far away and from another country is a little complicated but nothing I couldn't handle (says the naive first time buyer). There were three hurdles I had to get over - the vetting, transportation and paperwork for the boarder.

I flew up to Toronto with my trainer to try Crafty and we both loved him. I contemplated going back up for the vetting and possibly even driving my trailer up to drive my horse home but it was at least a 12 hour drive each way and I had no idea what it was like to cross the boarder with a horse. In the end, I wanted to get things moving forward and didn't have the ability to go back up for the vetting with my husband traveling and three kids to think about.

The trainer who showed us the horse was great. She crosses the boarder frequently to show in the US so was pretty unfazed by the process. I found that comforting. She gave me a long list of vets I could call and was very honest about which vets she uses and which she didn't know at all. I chose the vet closest to the farm where Crafty lived which was 20 minutes away. It was seriously remote and the other vets were an hour to two hours away. I had no references for this vet but she had come from Kentucky, was used to working with race horses and I decided expediency was worth the risk of an unknown vet.

The vetting was incredibly stressful. I hated not being there. The vet was actually great, especially at working to represent my interests. A couple of little things concerned her and I was trying to decide if I wanted any x-rays but she had to leave for an emergency call. I worried about letting her leave without doing x-rays so I called my vet in a state of rookie panic.

My vet, who was in the middle of showing her own horses at a jumper show, was wonderful but I was a train wreck. She was watching my videos between classes and texting her office to tell them what x-rays she wanted to see. I was upset because I just wanted my horse and I felt like for his price and for what I wanted to do there wasn't anything we were going to find that would keep me from buying him.

The Canadian vet went back the next day. We discussed her concerns and decided to x-ray the horse's left leg starting at the hoof and working our way up to the knee. That was the extent of what we planned to look at and my vet was comfortable with that and with the reasoning behind the decision. I didn't want to spend so much on the vetting that I wouldn't have anything left to do maintenance type things later. I felt I would rather get my horse home and have my vet watch him go and do x-rays here. I have no doubt he will need some joint support or injections of some kind but none of that worries me and he is sound on hard ground so what could go wrong? Also, the back x-rays my vet was interested in could not be done with the old equipment available to the Canadian vet. Again, I felt if we needed to do those X-rays at some point I preferred to do them at home with the treating vet having control over the images taken.

This is not necessarily a wise way to go about your vetting. Ideally, I would have been there. In a perfect world I would do X-rays, take it one thing at a time and make informed decisions. However, at my request, the horse would not be ridden again until I got him home. Right or wrong, I wanted to move quickly. If I were buying a more serious competition horse or spending a larger sum of money, I wouldn't have done it this way.

In the mean time, I was dialing the numbers of every transport company in Canada trying to find a truck heading south. They were awful. No one was calling me back and they kept telling me how busy they were driving horses north from Florida. I thought that was a bit absurd since surely the trucks had to go back south! Eventually one of the companies directed me to another that carries race horses down to Saratoga, New York pretty regularly. That did the trick!

A good transport company makes the whole thing so much easier!!!! I used Doyle's and they were great. They went up to get Crafty on a Tuesday afternoon and kept him overnight at their base near the border. Wednesday morning, they took his papers to the government office to be signed and crossed the boarder. I met them in Saratoga that evening, loaded Crafty onto my trailer and headed home.

The paperwork isn't terribly complicated I'm happy to know now. I had the vet rush the coggins so that took a couple of days. Then the vet's office did a health certificate. Someone needs to take the health certificate to the government office to be stamped. The trainer would have done it but it was quicker for us to have the transport company do it because their base is less than a mile from the office.

I have a friend who spent the early spring horse shopping in Florida, South Carolina and Virginia. She was looking for two horses - one for her and one for her daughter. She felt pretty strongly about being present at the vetting and ended up walking away from a lovely horse because of a side conversation she had while she was there. Another horse she vetted long distance but a trainer she knew well was there on the ground to make sure everything went well. That horse ended up not working out either but for different reasons.

Buying horses is emotionally challenging. The addition of distance into the equation simply increases the complexity of those emotions. If you are a first time buyer, try to find something within reasonable driving distance. Think about the cost of travel, time, emotional distress and wear on the horse when considering whether to save a little money by going a little farther. And be certain to involve your trainer or other chosen horse expert! It probably cost me $500.00 to bring my trainer with me to Canada but I would never ever have bought a horse, especially at that distance, without her consent. I just don't know enough to do it on my own and I need her to ask the questions I don't think of regarding work history, fitness, soundness, etc. I also needed her to ride him. She has ridden countless horses over the 30+ years she's been riding so she has a much more developed ability to feel a horse out and see what he's about.

If you need to buy a horse from far away, go for it. Take a deep breath, be patient and work through the steps. Surround yourself with people who know what they are doing and listen. And good luck!

Horse Shopping for Mom: A comical adventure with a happy ending!

More than two months before my husband accepted the inevitable - a horse of my own - I stumbled
upon an ad on Sport Horse Nation. "Event horse with lots of lower level experience ready to move up." I looked at the ad every night for two months. Eventually I noticed that the horse lived in Ontario, Canada, about 2 hours north of Toronto and a 12 hour drive from where I live. Still, I couldn't stop thinking about him and I determined to find a way to make him my own.

The first thing I had to do was convince my husband, with a little creative math, that my horse wouldn't cost him too much money. I pulled that off by April and went out to find my horse.

I spoke on the phone with the trainer of my Canadian heartthrob. She was great, he sounded ideal and I wanted him more than ever. My trainer thought I was nuts, but she usually does! There was still snow on the ground and I couldn't imagine how I was going to get to Canada to look at a horse - I couldn't completely abandon my three kids, my husband travels and life was busy.

So I set about finding another horse or two to look at closer to home. My plan was to bring my daughter or my trainer along with me to look at horses. I couldn't possibly buy a horse without at least one of them but, unfortunately, they were too busy to go with me. So I decided to just go out and look all by myself!

The first thing you should know is that I hadn't even sat on a horse in 8 months. I had leased a horse last year until the end of July. I rode my daughter's horse about 3 times in the fall and that was it! So I really had no business trying horses on my own but I'm an obstinate person with no patience and I knew I wouldn't get my trainer to go to Canada without demonstrating my determination.

My theory was that I was capable of sitting on a horse to walk and trot and possibly canter.  I would be able to eliminate any horses that were super obviously unacceptable. I was looking at horses that were pretty close by so if I thought they were worth a second look, I could bring someone more qualified back with me.

I went to see two horses somewhat locally.  The first was an 8 year old OTTB mare. She was very sweet but I was pretty sure my trainer would say no to her. I did manage to walk, trot and canter her all on my own without falling off which struck me as a bit of a miracle at the time. The second horse was with the trainer we bought my daughter's pony, Pumba, from a couple of years ago. She had heard I was looking and thought she had just the thing for me. The horse was super cute and lovely on the ground, well behaved under saddle but a little small and not really my match. I was very proud of myself for going out shopping on my own and saving everyone's time.

The only horse left to look at was my man in Canada. In all seriousness, there was very little for sale at the time and I had a pretty tight budget. If I travelled to Pennsylvania or Virginia where there would be more horses, the prices went up. My Canadian had the exchange rate going for him so I decided it was time to book a trip.

My trainer decided to go along with my plan. Neither of us had ever been to Toronto so it sounded like a good adventure. I booked plane tickets, a rental car and hotel all with my husband's airline miles. That was a bit sneaky of me. He gave me a budget and told me it had to include everything - travel, vetting, tack, etc. He never mentioned use of air miles!

I suppose it was a bit crazy to go so far to see one horse. It was a tiring trip north and we landed right after a huge plane from China so got stuck in a long immigration line. We drove an hour to the hotel and in the morning headed north. The drive was desolate and beautiful. We were absolutely in the middle of nowhere. It's a bit of a miracle that we managed to find the place!

When we got there, Crafty - that's his name, Crafty Breeze, and it's a bit ironic since I am very crafty - was just what I hoped he would be. He has excellent ground manners. I rode him around a bit at all 3 gaits and he made me look good. He's handsome which doesn't hurt. We walked him out through some fields so my trainer could take him over some XC jumps. He was a perfect gentleman.

As we walked the Canadian trainer told us about the property which used to be home to an event called Checkmate and which my trainer was very familiar with. Later I looked up some old photos of the place which were pretty cool. There were still some old advanced jumps in the woods. The farm had been sold and would close in the fall so it was pretty cool to be there.

My trainer hopped on, rode him around, jumped over a fence a few times and had a great time! We walked him back, hosed him, grazed him and headed off to find some food. It is worth mentioning we found an absolutely amazing restaurant called Mylar and Loretta's seriously in the middle of nowhere and well worth going out of your way for a visit. We chatted over an excellent feast and marveled at my luck.

We caught an earlier flight back to Massachusetts and I got to work on vetting a horse long distance (worthy of a whole separate post) and shipping him down here.

I've waited a long time to have a horse of my own. I am so grateful Crafty came into my life. I'm having a blast riding him everyday and think he is just the coolest horse ever. And it doesn't hurt that he looks good too!

Looking Back: When buying a horse feels good and right.

I've posted a few times about the struggles we've had over the winter but I would like to go back and tell the story of how we found Quizz and the incredibly positive experience we had buying her.

Last summer we went to Elizabeth's first recognized event. She was doing the Starter Division but still, it was a step up. While she was out walking the XC course with her trainer, I stayed in the barn to finish braiding her pony. A lovely young woman stabled across from us asked me if I knew of anyone interested in buying a horse. She seemed less determined to sell a horse and more confused about the right course for her future as an eventer.

I said I might be interested in a horse and invited her to tell me about her lovely mare. At the end of our conversation I told her I thought that sounded like the kind of horse you keep, not the kind you sell, and reminded her how difficult it is to find a horse that can stay sound and take good care of you. I think these were difficult conversations for her. She had owned the horse for nearly 6 years and had known her since she was a baby. Quizz had helped her overcome some fears and they had moved up the levels together. I could tell she really didn't want to sell her but she was also aware that it wasn't fair to ask Quizz to do more. They had gone as far as they could together and it was, sadly, time to part.

We went out and competed, went home and moved on with our lives but I kept thinking about Quizz. I mentioned it to my trainer and she thought I was a little crazy. We really weren't looking yet. We hardly met the horse and I had one conversation with the owner. It was strange how seriously I wanted to track them down.

A month or so passed and I was unable to contact them. The prior owner is not on Facebook by her full name and I didn't know who her trainer was. I found their records online but not them.

The first week of August I was at Apple Knoll in Millis, Massachusetts where our Pony Club is fortunate to have camp for one week each summer. I was in charge of camp so was there around the clock. The first day of camp a trailer pulled in and I recognized the driver as a woman who had been stabled with us at the show over the summer. I was pretty sure she would know where to find Quizz. And yes, I was still obsessing about finding her!

This is the craziest part of the story. I approached the woman and asked if she remembered the horse and rider pair from the show earlier in the summer.  Her answer is too much to believe. The passenger in her trailer was none other than Quizz. She was at Apple Knoll to be sold. As luck would have it, we were able to spend time with Quizz that entire week. My daughter rode her a few times in her pony club lessons. We were able to see her lovely personality and be very sure of who this horse is. Our trainer came to ride her thinking we were nuts but by the end of the morning, she was a little in love as well.  Quizz has that effect on people.

Later we found out that as we were trying to track down Quizz's owner, she was looking for us. She wanted Quizz to go to a young rider who would keep her forever and give her a really good home. The best part of buying Quizz has been expanding our family to include her prior owner. When someone owns a horse like Quizz for as long as she did, they want to know that their horse is being cared for properly. From our end it felt wonderful to buy a well loved horse from a responsible owner. Quizz had a heart condition which the owners immediately informed us about. They opened their vet records. They gave us the report from Tufts regarding her heart issue. They did everything so well that I think I'm a bit spoiled as I go through this again looking for my own horse.

I did freak out right after we bought her. We do intend to keep Quizz forever and I think as that reality washed over me I panicked. But her prior owner could not have been more wonderful. We are in constant contact. I am excited for her as she starts her adventure with a new young horse and she loves getting updates on Quizz's adventures.

A couple of weeks ago, after Elizabeth's first XC run of the season at a schooling show, she sat in the
back seat texting with Quizz's old owner all about how much fun she had. I think it's pretty awesome for all of us. Quizz is amazing. It would be selfish to keep her all to ourselves.

This weekend the announcer at King Oak called out the name Quizz D'Orange once again but this time with a younger rider and at a lower level. Quizz had her issues over the winter but honestly that is to be expected in an 11 year old who had been going Preliminary last summer. Her issues were confusing for the humans and we never really identifies what was bothering her but whatever it was, we addressed it and she feels great now! She's very confident and proud of herself, especially as she runs XC. And she is again building confidence in her rider. Rather than fearing speed, my daughter received time faults for going too fast! Looks like it will be time to move up sooner than we thought but we couldn't have done any of it without Quizz.